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Old 06-24-2017, 09:21 PM   #1
OutOfTheCube
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Default The Best and Strangest Names of the Draft

I'm always a fan of some of the awesome, strange, and downright crazy names that come up during the NHL Entry Draft. In alphabetical order, let's take a look at the best name drafted by each team!

Anaheim Ducks: Maxime Comtois (Round 2, Pick 50)

With only five picks, the Ducks didn't have a lot of name flair at the draft. Maxime Comtois stands out as being an awesome French-Canadian handle.

Arizona Coyotes: Erik Walli Walterholm (Round 7, Pick 190)

It was a fierce competition for the Arizona Coyotes, with fantastic names like Mackenzie Entwistle and Cameron Crotti coming up. Still, I have to give it to their last pick, whose three name combination just flows incredibly and is totally bizarre.

Boston Bruins: Jack Studnicka (Round 2, Pick 53)

If he makes it, the headlines just write themselves, don't they? "Studnicka a stud in Toronto", "Studnicka in the nick of time". Hallmark of a great name.

Buffalo Sabres: Ukko-Pekka Luukkonen (Round 3, Pick 89)

Does a name get any more Finnish than four sets of repeating letters?

Calgary Flames: D'artagnan Joly (Round 6, Pick 171)

He's a human being in 2017 named D'artagnan. Nothing more needs to be said. Calgary drafted a few great names in this draft, but that stands out for sheer classic awesomeness.

Carolina Hurricanes: Stelio Mattheos (Round 3, Pick 73)

While Morgan Geekie stands out for being unfortunate, Stelio Mattheos stands out for pure bad-assery one pick later. He sounds like the hero in a fantasy novel.

Chicago Blackhawks: Parker Foo (Round 5, Pick 144)

One of these 'Foo's' is going to make the NHL eventually, and it's going to be glorious when they do.

Colorado Avalanche: Igor Shyrev (Round 5, Pick 125)

Colorado didn't give me much to work with, but I thought this very old school Russian name was at least interesting.

Columbus Blue Jackets: Alexandre Texier (Round 2, Pick 45)

This fellow from France has a very curious French name.

Dallas Stars: Jake Oettinger (Round 1, Pick 26)

Dallas kept it pretty tame this year. The only name that stands out is the rather unique last handle of their first round goalie.

Detroit Red Wings: Kasper Kotkansalo (Round 3, Pick 71)

Detroit had a couple of good contenders, but alliteration counts for a lot in an awesome names contest. This Finnish handle is a doozie. On the opposite end of the spectrum is 'John Adams', maybe the most bland name of the draft taken in the 6th round.

Edmonton Oilers: Ostap Safin (Round 4, Pick 115)

It just seems like a random jumble of letters. AKA the prototypical Oilers pick.

Florida Panthers: Sebastian Repo (Round 6, Pick 184)

Also, if guys would have automatic awesome nicknames, that is worth big points. "The Repo Man"? Oh yeah.

LA Kings: Drake Rymsha (Round 5, Pick 138)

Sounds like it belongs on a rap album more than a hockey player.

Minnesota Wild: Jacob Golden (Round 5, Pick 147)

A real solid hockey name. This is a guy you can imagine going to war for you, doing whatever it takes to win.

Montreal Canadiens: Jarret Tyszka (Round 5, Pick 149)

I'm not even sure how to pronounce it, so that counts for something. Montreal didn't provide many interesting names.

Nashville Predators: Grant Mismash (Round 2, Pick 61)

It's obvious, right? Mish-mash? Love it.

New Jersey Devils: Jocktan Chainey (Round 7, Pick 191)

New Jersey was one of the stronger teams for strange names (Gilles Senn and Fabian Zetterlund are both fantastic in their own way) but the bizarre first name 'Jocktan' stands out as truly unique.

New York Islanders: Arnaud Durandeau (Round 6, Pick 165)

Another tough competition on the NYI. Jason Cockerill and Sebastian Aho (yes, another one) are great, but I have to give it to another brilliant French-Canadian handle.

New York Rangers: Dominik Lakatos (Round 6, Pick 157)

A classic Czech name that evokes a fierce image.

Ottawa Senators: Drake Batherson (Round 4, Pick 121)

Only four picks for Ottawa gives us not much to choose from. A second 'Drake' on this list, just because everyone else they picked was fairly normal.

Philadelphia Flyers: Morgan Frost (Round 1, Pick 27)

Philadelphia picked some great names this draft, but Morgan Frost sounds more like a superhero alter-ego than a real name. Also, Frost is cold, hockey is cold... it's a great hockey name.

Pittsburgh Penguins: Jan Drozg (Round 5, Pick 152)

Another name that sounds straight out of a fantasy movie, except this one sounds like the villain. Or maybe a monster.

San Jose Sharks: Mario Ferraro (Round 2, Pick 49)

Can you get any more Italian?

St. Louis Blues: Klim Kostin (Round 1, Pick 31)

Not a lot of great names, it came down between this and fellow alliterative name Anton Andersson. This was more unique.

Tampa Bay Lightning: Cole Guttman (Round 6, Pick 180)

Classic hockey name. Again, the headlines write themselves.

Toronto Maple Leafs: Eemeli Rasanen (Round 2, Pick 59)

Toronto didn't have many stand-outs. Finland provides this great name in the second round, however.

Vancouver Canucks: Petrus Palmu (Round 6, Pick 181)

Vancouver has a few oddities this draft, but the only other name really in contention was Kole Lind in the second round. I thought this great alliterative Finnish name stood out a lot more.

Vegas Golden Knights: Lucas Elvenes (Round 5, Pick 127)

Vegas had a ton of picks, but this fifth rounder had the most inspiring name, in my opinion.

Washington Capitals: Sebastian Walfridsson (Roudn 5, Pick 151)

Great, unique Swedish name. Kristian Roykas Marthinsen in the seventh round was another, but I thought this one just flowed better,

Winnipeg Jets: Croix Evingson (Round 7, Pick 211)

Another team with some great contenders, I had to go with this late round pick. 'Croix' is too strange of a first name to ignore.

And that's it! Obviously there were some teams with a lot more crazy names than others (Arizona took the cake this year). What were some of your favorite names from the draft that I may have missed?
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Old 06-24-2017, 09:28 PM   #2
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At first I was musing about how much D'artagnan was picked on in elementary school with such a weird name. Playground justice is swift and cruel.

Then I remembered he was the youngest of seven brothers. No one's messing with that family.

It won't be too long before someone named "Stryker" makes the league....
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Old 06-24-2017, 10:08 PM   #3
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I had jocktan once.

I wouldn't recommend it.
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Old 06-24-2017, 10:14 PM   #4
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Haha Walli Walterholm.

That's absolutely fantastic. Imagine that on the pbp.

Jocktan Chainey may take the cake though. Such a erotic sounding name. Makes you think of a hockey-themed male stripper. If he catches you admiring his jock tan, you gonna get asphyxiated.

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Old 06-24-2017, 10:29 PM   #5
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I had jocktan once.

I wouldn't recommend it.
Jocktan Chainey - Sounds like a character from one of the Will Ferrell Anchorman movies!
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Old 06-24-2017, 10:31 PM   #6
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Andrei Altybarmakyan looks like he just started pulling random letters out of a hat to come up with his last name.
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Old 06-24-2017, 10:49 PM   #7
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You missed Morgan Geekie
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Old 06-24-2017, 11:50 PM   #8
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HM to filip sveningsson
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Old 06-25-2017, 02:06 AM   #9
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The Coyotes are by far the best. Erik Walli Walterholm and Mackenzie Entwistle sound like they're English lords from the 1800's.
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Old 06-25-2017, 06:49 AM   #10
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How are Bostonians ever going to pronounce this guy's name: URHO VAAKANAINEN
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Old 06-25-2017, 11:00 AM   #11
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How are Bostonians ever going to pronounce this guy's name: URHO VAAKANAINEN
No kidding. They can't even pronounce Orr.
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Old 06-25-2017, 12:13 PM   #12
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Great effort OOTC - enjoyed the read as also fascinated by strange names in the draft. Well done.
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Old 06-25-2017, 12:21 PM   #13
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I'd still give it to Entwhistle. Also, Kailer Yamamoto is still probably the winner for the Oilers.
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