On your knees - A new religion!!!! - Page 5 - Calgarypuck Forums - The Unofficial Calgary Flames Fan Community

Cheese · 10-30-2007, 06:47 AM

It would be fantastic to see the crowd give Kipper a Standing O tonite just before the puck drops....19,000 plus chanting Kipper and giving him the Kipper wave all in unison...make it happen Flames fans...show the man.

Nehkara · 10-30-2007, 07:10 AM

As always, I remain a loyal Kiprusoffarian.

Dope-AS-Fack · 10-30-2007, 10:44 AM

I am a Kiprusoffarian!

Caged Great · 10-30-2007, 11:06 AM

I too am a devout follower of the kiprusoffarian faith.

TheRedCrush · 10-30-2007, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheyCallMeBruce

Whatever.

I am a Dionite. All who fear and worship "The Eternal Lord Dion" shall bow and praise his name 3 x 3 x 3. For it is written...The Dion shall set you free with a Double Dion and a booming slapshot.

well put.

i never knew it was feasable to be an active part of TWO religions.

Lord
Have
Mercy

Salt Water Cowboy #10 · 10-30-2007, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dope-AS-Fack

I am a Kiprusoffarian!

Someone needs to make shirts!!! Ignition screenworks where are you?? do it, do it now!

SarichFan · 10-30-2007, 02:55 PM

I approve of this religion.

CaptainCrunch · 10-30-2007, 02:55 PM

A reading from the book of Sutter as the letter to Larry Kelly

And yes we did rejoice upon your bestowment of this gift to our congregation. And forever do we hold you in the highest esteem as we present your with the vestements of $36 million pieces of gold, two cases of mead and a powerboat with deep water fishing equipment.

And it was good, as the savior came across the vastness of the oceans and did reward the faithful with feats of wonder and daring.

And yeh, on his first appearance he did banish the evils presented by the whale, the wheel and the shark. And though our savior was vanquished in a battle with the elements, and the gods themselves did frown opon this church on that very day, we were given a vision. That our goaltender would not go to work for the dark apostles serving the Kings, or into the service of the devils, or drown in the black pit of Oil. But that he would continue to drive the Flames in front of him, and pull them through the desert from behind.

And it was good.

And you brother Larry, with a reasoned Brow, and a gilted chair did lift up our hearts, and you, and our savior did pronounce that you would be there, to rule over our hearts for a period of no less then 6 years, and that the Oil, and the whale, and the Mountains and the very Wild would all in that time be subserviant to us.

Amen.

foofighter15 · 10-30-2007, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaptainCrunch

A reading from the book of Sutter as the letter to Larry Kelly

And yes we did rejoice upon your bestowment of this gift to our congregation. And forever do we hold you in the highest esteem as we present your with the vestements of $36 million pieces of gold, two cases of mead and a powerboat with deep water fishing equipment.

And it was good, as the savior came across the vastness of the oceans and did reward the faithful with feats of wonder and daring.

And yeh, on his first appearance he did banish the evils presented by the whale, the wheel and the shark. And though our savior was vanquished in a battle with the elements, and the gods themselves did frown opon this church on that very day, we were given a vision. That our goaltender would not go to work for the dark apostles serving the Kings, or into the service of the devils, or drown in the black pit of Oil. But that he would continue to drive the Flames in front of him, and pull them through the desert from behind.

And it was good.

And you brother Larry, with a reasoned Brow, and a gilted chair did lift up our hearts, and you, and our savior did pronounce that you would be there, to rule over our hearts for a period of no less then 6 years, and that the Oil, and the whale, and the Mountains and the very Wild would all in that time be subserviant to us.

Amen.

Well done. I should send you the thing like this I did for Nintendo vs. Playstation

CheckRaise · 10-30-2007, 03:12 PM

Well played CaptainCrunch! Way to keep the thread on the right track!!
Loved how you managed to put lots of rival teams into your post, especially the whale!

God I hate the whale....

Coach · 10-30-2007, 03:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CheckRaise

Well played CaptainCrunch! Way to keep the thread on the right track!!
Loved how you managed to put lots of rival teams into your post, especially the whale!

God I hate the whale....

dont we all?

CaptainCrunch · 10-30-2007, 03:25 PM

I think there's the book of Burke, which describes how fate intervened and made sure that the almighty Kipper ended up ruling in the heaven that is Calgary, and not serving in the hell that is Vancouver.

Locke · 10-30-2007, 04:02 PM

This thread gets 5 stars. Hands down.

Captain, that is all kinds of awesome right there.

Thor · 10-30-2007, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cheese

It would be fantastic to see the crowd give Kipper a Standing O tonite just before the puck drops....19,000 plus chanting Kipper and giving him the Kipper wave all in unison...make it happen Flames fans...show the man.

TESTIFY BROTHER! Amen

Hack&Lube · 10-30-2007, 04:09 PM

By the magnificent example of the almighty Kiprusoff (applauded be his name), all members are hereby compelled to inhale from the holy peace pipe (Regular Lights) 25 times a day on penalty of good health.

Kipper 7:34

chub · 10-30-2007, 04:59 PM

How many will Kipper save tonight?

How many prayers will he answer?

I can definately pray to a God that smokes and drinks hehehehe! Guess he will be my first God !

The Christian God took seven days to create the earth and still could do nothing to help the Flames, Yet Kipper did!

DMac · 10-30-2007, 05:11 PM

Apparently there are so many religions amongst Flames fans that a time will come where they have to be united.

I propose two more (which have been listed as my religions on Facebook since summer):

Those of:

-IN SUTTER WE TRUST (maybe a worship chant to the Sutterite or Sutteranity religion)

and

-Keenanism (those we see Keenan as the saviour)

chub · 10-30-2007, 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DMac

Apparently there are so many religions amongst Flames fans that a time will come where they have to be united.

I propose two more (which have been listed as my religions on Facebook since summer):

Those of:

-IN SUTTER WE TRUST (maybe a worship chant to the Sutterite or Sutteranity religion)

and

-Keenanism (those we see Keenan as the saviour)

Dude Keenasism? I am not there yet! I would love to be, not yet though!

CaptainCrunch · 10-30-2007, 11:07 PM

A reading from the book of victory

And thus our great and noble savior accepted our sacrifice and our tears and $35 million pieces of gold, he put down his roots and looked about and said that this land was good.

Then with one hand he plucked a mighty oak from the ground and fashioned a mighty sword, and with the other he plucked a cow and rammed his hand up into it making a mighty mit and he nodded to his followers and said none but one shall pass. Then he looked at one small child who looked sad and he said what botherest you? And the child despaired as he had been seduced by the tepid Oil, having been sold into its service by a father bothered by mead and woman with bruises on her legs.

And Kipper took pity on the child and said, here onto you is a flames jersey to soak up your despair, and the child was contented.

but Kipper had a longeth journey, and he traveled to a village and he saw villagers who had been crippled by fear and doubt. And Kipper dined with them and found out that above all they feared on this night the return of the Predator, a foul beast who devoured souls and hitteth the villagers from behind. And Kipper said to them, do not fear what you fear the most, I will slay the foul Predator, and with his mighty sword and his cow glove, Kipper pulled a mountain to him and fashioned a mask which he wreathed in fire and skulls.

And when the Predator returned to the village that night, it faced not a village of scared people, but their god and protector. But there is no greater plotter then our savior, and though the beast attacked, and roared and flung 39 stones against the almighty, the village held and the Predator slung off into the woods in search of an easier prey, like a whale, or a puddle of Oil.

And as the village celebrated and feasted and createth babies, the Kipper meditated, because he knew that the war drums were beating in the form of a winged wheel, and he steeled himself.

Philly06Cup · 10-30-2007, 11:38 PM

Note to Kiprusoffians -- you should chant "Kipper" when he makes a good save. With the exception of the last regular-season home game last year, when an "MVP" chant broke out in the last 2 minutes, I've never heard any chants for Kiprusoff: that shouldn't happen. I want to hear a Kipper chant started up the Dome.