[Kidder]

Listen, Flames fans, to a story
That was written long ago
Bout a city up the highway
And the ugly-folk who love it so

In this city, was a franchise
Buried deep in the NHL
And the Oilers’ faithful swore
And cussed about their lifelong hell

Go ahead and hate Edmonton
Go ahead and mock Oiler “friends”
It’s the closest that we get to heaven
Watching them fly by the defensive end
There won’t be any blowhards crowing
Come elimination day
All the joyous Flames fans’ laughter
When McDavid walks away

So the heathens of the river valley
Send their jerseys over the glass
Demanding the Lord Stanley’s treasure
Despite a team that plays like ass

Came an answer from the Press box
With our tier one fans we will share
All the bad contracts we’ve assembled
All the feces buried there

Go ahead and hate Edmonton
Go ahead and mock Oiler “friends”
It’s the closest that we get to heaven
Watching them fly by the defensive end
There won’t be any blowhards crowing
Come elimination day
All the joyous Flames fans’ laughter
When McDavid walks away

Media fan boys cried with anger
Change our goalies, fire the coach!
And they killed McDraitl’s spirit
Whose defensive game’s still beyond reproach

Now they slunk around in sweatpants
Future capspace, marked in red
Check the standings and looked beneath it
“Playoff berth” is all but dead

Go ahead and hate Edmonton
Go ahead and mock Oiler “friends”
It’s the closest that we get to heaven
Watching them fly by the defensive end
There won’t be any blowhards crowing
Come elimination day
All the joyous Flames fans’ laughter
When McDavid walks away