hey guys
just thought i'd give a little update.
on july 27th i posted this...
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here we are at the end of july and i am sad to say that my mom called today to say that after today's visit with the doc that my dad likely only has 3 weeks tops.
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well, here we are 25 days later and again today i was able to hang out with my dad for about an hour at hospice. his 'big meal' everyday is lunch - so that's what i bring him (and my mom) everyday.
it's funny becuz he has his 'favourites' and most of them are pretty easy meals to throw together. he just loves asian lettuce wraps - the recipe i've got is so easy and they taste sooo good! saturday was a bit more work - i did ribs again, but this time i took them down 'hot off the smoker'. the kicker is to have a 6-hour rib smoke ready in time for lunch meant that saturday started a lot earlier than normal!! ha! we've also been blessed with awesome friends who have brought over a number of frozen meals for both our family and my folks - so some days it's as simple as throwing something in the oven for an hour and then driving to hospice for the visit. i'm just glad i'm able to do stuff like that for him and i know both my folks really appreciate it.
i'm currently building my daughter a bunk bed (from scratch!) so i've been keeping my dad up-to-date everyday with the progress. i know he wishes he could be helping me but honestly, just being able to share pics and 'build stories' with him is awesome.
killer_carlson - i love the 'good laugh' advise. my daughter sure gave me a good one the other day. i started the bunk bed on saturday so my daughter was super pumped that dad's building her a bunk bed. i get all the tools out of the garage and onto the driveway and while i'm working i look up into the garage. there she is, this pint sized 4-year old, sitting on her little lawn chair, watching me work while drinking a glass of chocolate milk. she finished her chocolate milk, walks over to me and says, 'ok daddy, i'm done my chocolate milk, how much longer until my bed is ready?!?' ha! in my mind i'm thinking "well, i'm currently milling down the wood that will eventually become your bed posts" so i just ended up telling her it would be a little while yet. ha! ha! my dad loved that!
one of the toughest things right now is that my dad has good days and bad days and you just never know how he's doing until you get there. last week he had a really rough wednesday/thursday and then friday/saturday he was fantastic (the best i've seen him in a while). sunday was another rough one and today started out rough and got better as the day went on. my mom told me this morning that he didn't even remember my visit yesterday. i guess it's a combination of the medications and the cancer continuing to spread and affect the normal function of his body. he tends to get confused a lot more now and he's more irritable/annoyed at things... but i think that comes from needing people to do stuff for him that he knows he used to be able to do - that's a really tough one for him (he's rather independent and likes to do things for himself... his way.... hmmmm.... i wonder where i got that trait from! ha!)
another tough thing that i hadn't anticipated is that when you go there everyday, you get to know the other people in hospice. i was chatting with a really great guy over the weekend named Denis, just a delight to talk to. when i came for my visit today my mom told me that Denis had passed away over night. i barely knew him but it still chokes me up. maybe it's the realization that soon it will be my dad that won't be there the next day - i don't know, but it's tough.