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Old 03-29-2017, 06:08 PM   #4732
N-E-B
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Originally Posted by Major Major View Post
When the Islanders finally broke their 10 year playoff drought, TSN did a top 10 list of embarrassing Islander moments from that decade. Yashin, Luongo for Dipietro followed by that contract and so on. It was kind of an homage to how unbelievably poorly that franchise was run, a reminder that it would not be forgotten if you will.

So the question is, what is the oilers top 10 list of historic ineptness for the last 10 years?

10. After going to the cup final, Pronger decides he no longer likes Edmonton and demands a trade. The trade brought back Smid, Lupul, a draft pick that would become Riley Nash, a draft pick that would become Travis Hamonic, and a draft pick that would become Jordan Eberle. Pronger went on to win the cup that year and it marked the beginning of the record 10 year playoff drought.

9. Michael Nylander an Oiler? Kevin Lowe sure thought so. After coming to a handshake agreement, Lowe and co were patiently awaiting the signed contract to be faxed, but were taken unaware when Washington announced that they'd come to an agreement with the silk handed swede. Lowe proclaimed this was an unprecedented act and would look for legal recourse as this influenced their dealings with other FAs. Legal recourse of course told him deals aren't deals until they're signed.

8. Dany Heatley an Oiler? Steve Tambellini sure thought so. After demanding a trade from Ottawa, the sniper was told that a deal had been made. The only thing is... well, it was with Edmonton. Heatley couldn't decide which destination would be worse, Edmonton or Ottawa. The Oilers brass decided to dispense with their pride (or that they had none to begin with) and charm Danny boy, but soon realised they were being used as leverage and Heatley became a Shark.

7. The summer of offer sheets. In 2007, Lowe attempted to lure 2 high profile RFAs via offer sheet. He offered a 7 year, 50 million dollar deal to Vanek, and a 5 year 21 million dollar deal to Dustin Penner. The latter would prove successful, drawing ire from an angry Brian Burke who later would say that he challenged Kevin Lowe to a barn fight. It would not be long before the oilers would regret the Penner deal as he could not regain the form from the beginning of his career with Anaheim, but instead found a new form: round.

6. Under pressure. After being snubbed by Nylander, the oilers decided their big ticket would be offered to Sheldon Sourray. They signed him to a 5 year 27 million dollar deal. Sourray almost immediately reinjured a bad shoulder and spent most of the first year injured. It became obvious that the relationship between team and player was fractured right then and there, as the lumbering dman claimed the injury was caused by Lowe pressuring him to play before he was healed sighting a tough guy mentality. There were suggestions that this attitude effected more than just Sourray, as Tom Renney hinted that he too was pressured to play injured players.

5. Seattle Grungers? In 2012, Darryl Katz took the management team of the Oilers to Seattle 2 months before the drop dead date for an arena deal would hit for city council. The city, who thought they had a deal worked out with Katz, was now dealing with a volatile renegotiation through veiled threats of moving. After being asked to publicly state his new demands, Katz refused but did say that he revised the deal struck earlier that year and no longer saw it as viable. Staring down the barrel of a gun, then mayor Stephen Mandel caved to Katz' demands and signed one of the worst arena/real estate deals with a private entity in Canadian history.

4. Knowing a thing or 2. In a press conference that had everything from contract tampering to a middle aged man melting down on camera, the oilers state of the union and introduction of Mactavish as GM in 2012 epitomised no goodness. In it, Lowe distinguished between fans based on how much they spent on the team, claimed that years of losing were a part of his plan, and that of course, you'd understand if you'd won as much as he has, which you haven't, so shut up. The theme of being above criticism as the worst run franchise in league history was hard to take for a fan base that was in need of competence, but all they saw in front of them was an easily wavered and flustered long time member of the club, the man they lovingly call "keys please".

3. Carry water, chop wood. Dallas Eakins would become a legendary exclamation point on a horrid franchise's struggle to get one single thing right. After firing promising head coach Ralph Kruger over Skype, Mactavish's boldest and oddest move was hiring Marlies coach Dallas Eakins. Miscast from day one, Dallas implemented a no donuts for reporters rule, a roll over like a dog drill, and a do anything but play defense defense. The swarm, as it was known, was responsible for countless, "this guy scored" graphics and embarrassment for a team and fan base that was on the brink of delirium. Jerseys rained down on to the ice and fans lined the walk way at rexall to boo the players to their face.

2. Comrie fiasco. Kevin Lowe had a deal on the table to ship disgruntled local "Star" Mike Comrie to Anaheim in exchange for prospect Corey Perry and a first round draft pick, but there was a catch. Lowe wanted Comrie to pay the team damages for holding out and demanding a trade. He thought the only way to get value for Comrie was for Comrie to pay him 2.5 million dollars out of his own pocket. Rightly, the cheap furniture heir and smurf laughed at this notion and later was traded, free of charge, to Philadelphia for Jeff woywitka, Danny syvret, and Rob Schremp.

1. Over the span of 6 years, the league needed to revise draft lottery rules 2 times. Both in response to one pitiful team's failure to launch despite being given some of the most favorable conditions in sports history. An entire league cringed in 2016, as it nearly had to be changed a third time. Alas, the oilers only accrued 4 1st overall picks over a 6 year span (two were traded, one they wish they still could). But it wasn't until they received a gift that was not only generous, but generational, did they start to see winning as a possiblity. Ryan Strome was the player that the oilers were in line to pick, but on one fateful June evening, to the chagrin of everyone outside Edmonton including the player subject to the lottery itself, Bill Daly held up the golden grease stain, with a pained look that read "it is by the dumbest luck imaginable that you, the worst team to ever grace this league, will crawl out of the hole of self inflicted awfulness to maybe make the playoffs 2 years from now."
Awesome list! I might add Daryl Katz's "Welcome to Edmonton" skit with McDavid at the draft. That was embarrassing to watch.
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