Quote:
Originally Posted by DuffMan
Aside from a priest touching me when I was a child, I can't think of what I'd be angry about. You could be wrong.
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First, I'm sorry that happened to you. Thank you for your courage in putting that out there, and I better understand your perspective, but I don't think I'm 'wrong'.
Justified anger, certainly. But was that the Christian beliefs, or just some regular piece of human #### in silly looking robes? A belief/faith system is no excuse or cause for what happened to you and countless other people.
You're angry at the Church. Perfectly acceptable; I am too. The organized system set up to enable and protect these horrifyingly traumatic acts and monsters is purely disgusting. No argument there.
However, I don't think attacking the underlying foundation of that system (Christianity) and labeling all Christians as idiots and scum is helpful. The overwhelming ferocity, aggression, and delight that some secular opponents take in ripping apart religious tenets and values is not just targeted destruction, but wholly destructive. In my experience all it has really done is more firmly entrench people in a dichotomy.
I was a semi-devoted Catholic (as most are, really) until I reached the age of reason and began to think critically. When I started to question, research, and apply scientific reasoning to my beliefs I found, within myself, the two worlds were entirely incompatible. I was angry because I felt lied to, I was angry because I felt my thoughts were restricted, I was angry at the passive and dismissive intolerance of my faith, and I was angry that all of those qualities negatively impacted other people too. Moreover, it was operating under an umbrella of corruption that protected some of the worst kinds of humanity.
I put that anger out there, and I put it out there very strongly for a lot of years. What I found is that I only ever really got more angry and upset, and it was just a never-ending battle with old friends simply because they went somewhere I used to go on Sundays. They weren't bad people, they weren't hurting people.
Once I learned to be more rationally minded and let go of my anger I was better able to help my friends gain my perspective. In turn, I also far better understood theirs. Turns out, some of the Christians in my life are disgusted by the Church's racket too, wish they would let go of discriminatory policies concerning sex, sexuality, and gender, and wanted a more harmonious relationship with other faiths and secular groups.
Of course you're never going to convince all members of a religious group, en masse, to reject the principles of the life with which they know and are comfortable. Yet, when I stopped being angry I felt healthier, and my conversations were healthier. I didn't necessarily forgive these people, and some of the things they believe still make me upset because I believe they are supporting an archaic belief structure that hurts people. But, I don't hate them, and I'm no longer aggressive towards them. That just pushes them right back into their comfort zone of the Church, which is where I would like to see them step out from once in a while.
Faith brings comfort to some of the people I care for most, like my mom. The dialogue I have had with her has really opened her to new understandings, perspectives, and levels of tolerance and/or acceptance. All I ever got when I fought with her was misery and contempt.
"I see as much misery out of them moving to justify theirselves as them that set out to do harm."